Laurel: What you don't know about the game that I was just playing through the curtains is that I was holding my breath not to crack up like I thought it was so fucking funny. Every time you walked through, I was like, slip out, and then you'd walk back through the other and I'd slip back in.

Daniel: I'm so glad that you can play games with yourself.

Daniel: And imagine that I am playing and it is just as much fun for you as though I were actually participating

Nichole: it. It was almost more fun. This is a really healthy relationship.

Daniel: So Laurel, for the last like 20 to 30 minutes? No for the last two to three minutes, sorry. I moved the decimal too far. Was leaving the little curtained alcove of recording every time I would enter it and vice versa.

Daniel: And trying to see how long it took for me to notice.

Laurel: Well, what I love most is that like I was walking down the stairs in front of you, like we were talking about. Something I left. Conversation ended and then it was like I was never here.

Nichole: Yeah. Now you know how it is to live with him.

Daniel: You guys, you guys, it's almost like you think that I don't have a ton of tasks to do for the podcast, and it's as though you think that I don't need to do them a second time because I forgot to do them the first time that I decided to do them.

Laurel: Does that really count as a second time if you didn't do them the first time?

Daniel: It doesn't. It's the thought that counts. I think of doing it. I think I've done it. I realize I have not done it, and then I do it and then I check to make sure I've done it. And sometimes I haven't.

Laurel: Turns out, sometimes, welcome to Poly Amateur Hour.

Daniel: Welcome to Poly Amateur. Oh I'm Daniel.

Laurel: I'm Nicole.

Laurel: Oh my God. And I'm Laurel. So I went on a first date yesterday.

Yeah.

Laurel: And the part that Daniel will enjoy is that I got the Jew tingle, like partway through it. Uh mm-hmm. He was mentioning the hipa and then I was like, oh, I thought you were Jewish.

Laurel: He is like, oh, what first made you think I was Jewish? And then I was like, the part where you talked about how supportive your parents were.

Daniel: Wait, were you being

Laurel: sarcastic? No, I wasn't.

Laurel: your mom is very supportive. She listens

Daniel: to this podcast. Yeah. Yeah. She writes in questions. Yeah. Yeah. I mean, there are so many different ways to be supportive. Yes. Like, is a herding dog supportive When it's nipping at your heels,

Laurel: it's like, Hey, you gotta get out of this field. The coyotes are coming.

Laurel: Uhhuh

Daniel: is a mother hen supportive when it just, pecks you to death. Jesus.

Laurel: Oh my God. , anyways, the part that Nicole will appreciate is he likes grocery shopping. Oh. And the first, the first thought I had is like, maybe I should set him up with Nicole.

Nichole: Yeah. Well, he seems capable of making a plan, so Yeah.

Daniel: Oh, I was thinking of something, was something,

Daniel: I was thinking of something. You were thinking something with something Jewish.

Laurel: It's like plain, I spy, I'm thinking of something, something Jewish.

Daniel: So I was writing a piece of fiction for a while, and I might pick it up again at some point. But one of the coits was that they were kind of Jews with, supernatural powers.

Daniel: Kind of like superhero powers, psychic powers, et cetera. But they were all like, particularly conspicuously useless in like really typically Jewish ways. Like I can detect. Others' thoughts, but only when they're fretting.

Daniel: Or I can walk through walls, but only from my living room to the bathroom.

Daniel: And I feel like the ways in which Jewish parents are supportive are kind of like that. Mm-hmm. For, for me. , What I'm hearing, Daniel, is that

Laurel: you're just very ungrateful.

Nichole: Oh my God. I'm sorry. I do not mean to c that.

Laurel: Fuck, that's my job. Okay. Um,

Daniel: The name of this episode is Please Do Not Listen. Abby.

Laurel: We love you Abby. We do.

Nichole: I have an entire other Jewish tangent, Welcome to the Jew cast. , So my friend was chairing a meeting the other night mm-hmm. Of sober people. And several people after she chaired talked about in their shares, like, oh yeah, my first, drink was manchez and I remembered that. I think it was last Passover I was trying to find a kosher alcohol removed wine.

Nichole: Mm-hmm. And there is none

because they're

Nichole: just like, you can have grape juice. Yeah. But like, I'm thinking million dollar idea, or at least tens of thousands dollars idea if you're a sober Jew.

Daniel: I don't know. There's just a tradition that goes back so far of that gross, incredibly thick, grape juice that you can get for any Jewish holiday.

Daniel: We're nostalgic about it, you know, I

Nichole: don't think you can, you can't get on the west coast though. I can't find it.

Daniel: Oh I can show you some places. I know a guy.

Laurel: I just think it's a really good idea.

Daniel: I mean, I look forward to seeing you take on the mad scientist jacket that I, I'm currently wearing and hanging out in the basement with beakers and bubbling tubes.

Daniel: It was

Laurel: a good birthday present, and you should stop making fun of it. You're gonna hurt my feelings.

Nichole: Laurel Gifted Daniel a, it, it looks, it's, it's, it's it's like a overcoat made of sweatshirt material.

Daniel: It's like the jacket from Stop Making Sense, but made out of Neoprene,

Laurel: but it's not, it wasn't supposed to be.

Laurel: David Burns. Stop making Sense jacket. It is. I didn't realize how big it was. It's so

Daniel: huge. It's so big. It's

Laurel: so big.

Daniel: I think you guys just have a fetish of my smallness and so you want to make me look even smaller.

Laurel: One, yes, a little bit. Two combined with my fetish for. David Byrne yes.

Nichole: Yeah. But David, by and stop Making sense. Is wearing also like pants? Yes. Like full length pants also. Giant pants. Yeah. Daniel Daniel's just wearing shorts right now. So the Overco is going like just

Daniel: you think that I'm wearing shorts? Yes.

Nichole: You don't

Daniel: fucking know. See

Nichole: his bare legs underneath it. It's a choice.

Nichole: It's a look.

Daniel: Short man, long jacket. End of my. Incredibly long dick hanging out the bottom.

Wow. My

Daniel: cervix puncher.

Oh god. Short skirt and a long jacket. That is exactly what I was thinking. Of course you were. Of course you were. Laurel.

Nichole: My ballet teacher dated the trumpeter from that band. Really? From cake? Yeah. Wow.

Daniel: I thought you said your belly teacher.

Laurel: Teach me how to belly.

Daniel: I'm gonna start slapping.

Laurel: Let's pull a laurel and just

Nichole: start slapping your belly. Okay. There she goes. Yep.

Daniel: You gonna,

Laurel: I'm gonna what? Excite the audience too much.

Daniel: Yeah. Yeah. Calm down Stu. Welcome to

Daniel: Our first segment is the first of its kind. Well, not the first of its kind.

Daniel: Not the first of this segment, but the first time that the microphone has been pointed out to Stubbert. Dumb Ooh. It is Invitation to Love for. A stew. Ooh.

Laurel: Yay. I'm so excited. So in Invitation to Love, we review the online datey profiles. Did I say that weird? I feel like I said that word. Datey. Datey. Yeah.

Laurel: The datey profiles about Datey stews. Uh,

Laurel: Yeah. And we give our hot tips for reeling in the babes. Reeling in the babes.

Nichole: Yeah.

Nichole: Nicole's like, you ruined my profile. No, no, no, no, no, you didn't.

Nichole: It, it was incredibly helpful for me. Yay. Um, and it did reel in. No, I'm just saying like, I don't know how qualified I feel. But you two Oh. Gave me great advice. We're not qualified at all. Oh, that's right. That's, that's the, that's

Laurel: the, that's literal name of the game.

Laurel: The concede of the show, right? Yeah. Yep, yep, yep, yep. The concede of the show is you shouldn't listen to us, but please listen to us

Daniel: shall I read aloud?

Laurel: What, okay. First, what platform are we looking at? Field. Okay. Okay. Alright. Okay.

Nichole: do we also have an idea of what this person is looking for? Oh, yeah. Did, did Stu

Laurel: say anything particular about.

Nichole: Fuck me.

Laurel: Not right now. You you.

Laurel: Oh, okay. We're gonna have to cut this one

Nichole: short today, folks. Sorry, I have a drinking problem. I spilled water all over myself.

Daniel: Sure. It's water. Let's talk about his profile. Seat belts. Looking for friends with Spark who are comfortable in poly slash en m situations as I am partnered in an LTR with an amazing f

Laurel: Long-term relationship. Amazing. Female Hooman?

Laurel: Yes, Hooman. Okay.

Daniel: first note, Stubbert, don't abbreviate female with f and don't say female either.

Daniel: Just say Woman F recalls for all of us. Trekkies. The Regi how do you guys feel? Oh, Nicole, look.

Laurel: Oh my, oh my God. God. Oh my God. Oh my God. This has never, I'm sorry.

Nichole: I'm sorry. Ever happened? You have never mistaken us and said the other person's name.

Nichole: This happened for the first time right now, and it's recorded forever. I'm sorry. Forever. I'm sorry. She's an asshole.

Daniel: All you

Daniel: look the same to me. Laurel. Laurel is raising her hand. How do you feel about the word female?

Laurel: I don't like it.

Daniel: Alright. Have it from, have it from an honest to goodness female.

Laurel: I had another question though.

Daniel: Yeah.

Laurel: What is the sexuality listed? 'cause that you get the stats at the top right? You get their like, gender and sexuality.

He's straight.

Laurel: He's straight. Yeah. Okay. So like you could just say partner. Yeah. You don't even, like we know you're seeing a woman.

Yeah.

Nichole: I would also LTR is up there.

Mm-hmm.

Nichole: I would not use an acronym in your first paragraph. I would tend, I would say maybe don't use acronyms at all.

Daniel: All right. continuing. Open, honest, transparent, and no secrets. No sneaking around. Expect the same,

Daniel: Looking for kindness, connection, and lovely times.

Daniel: Me musician slash creative. I'm fun, great company down for deep conversation and laughter, cute dates, adventures in the city. Music in good times. Love making out over cocktails in a cozy bar or under an umbrella in the rain. Cute.

Hmm. I love all of those situations. Are you saying that or is that part of the profile?

Daniel: No, that's me. I'm commenting. Okay. I don't like describing yourself as fun.

Laurel: Same. I don't think you have to.

Laurel: Yeah. Show don't tell. Show me your fun.

Laurel: like what kind of fun? What are we talking about when we say fun? Like I'm more amenable to like silliness or goofiness.

Laurel: 'cause that lets me know a little bit about like mm-hmm. Your kind of humor or energy. Mm-hmm.

Daniel: Yeah, but don't say that you're funny or goofy. 'cause then we know that you're definitely not. Remember the lady who was like, I have an amazing sense of humor.

Laurel: Well, you can't say that, but like, well, okay, well maybe we should do my profile. 'cause I say something about like, silliness in my profile.

Daniel: Okay, don't stop looking at this profile. Stay on this pro, oh, sorry, sorry.

Daniel: Okay. Stay on this profile. Focus, focus,

Laurel: focus, focus.

Daniel: All right. We got a couple of bullet points.

Nichole: Okay.

Daniel: Ally to LGBTQ plus community no misogyny slash homophobia slash racism slash maga. Okay.

Daniel: Absolutely. Cool with those who are sober and prefer connecting without drinks, et cetera. Nicole?

Daniel: I love to meet people IRL, but there seems to be a stigma about being poly slash ENM from some, so it would be great to not have to explain and justify myself to someone in a bar again and connect with like-minded people here.

Daniel: So, let's see. A field isn't just LinkedIn for fugitives from other dating apps.

Nichole: Oh, I wanted it to stop at LinkedIn for fugitives. Oh,

Daniel: I want there to be a LinkedIn for fugitives. Now

Nichole: it's field.

Nichole: I do think, like,

Nichole: Sorry to go back to, the no sneaking around, no blah, blah. Um,

Daniel: I personally love a little rah blah, blah, blah.

Nichole: I just like kind of the same way that we're saying with, it's like, show don't tell. Mm-hmm. You don't have to say that you're fun.

Nichole: I don't know that you need to lead with all the things that you're not.

Daniel: Rather look for a way to phrase it positively. Like what are you looking for rather than what you're not looking for. Like I wanna be open and start on the same page as you about non-monogamy.

Daniel: but since you're on field, I don't think that you need to say, I don't want to have to explain myself. 'cause you don't in this situation.

Nichole: That's what I was gonna say is if you're on field, that conversation has already happened ostensibly, just not between you two, you'd go, you both have entered the social contract of being on a non-monogamous platform.

Laurel: This also ties into like the no maga thing, like having to like put your, like lefty bonafides in your profile, living in a place like Portland that just seems like like virtue signaling to other people. Yes. cause I'm just like, yeah, no shit guys. Yeah. Like, But I think it might be more of an issue in other places

Daniel: now I think that we can disclose, because he did disclose in his sign off to his question a couple weeks ago that he's in New York.

Daniel: That he's in New York City. Okay. And I don't know that you need to signal those things in New York either. Like how many MAGA people are you getting approached by on field?

Laurel: Probably more than you are here. I'm guessing

Daniel: You think women are approaching him, like MAGA women in New York City are approaching him.

Laurel: I don't know if they're approaching him, but I do like it is just a way more populated and way more diverse place.

Daniel: It's true.

Nichole: Yeah. I mean, I also do not like, the listing of the, Abolish all this and, and do all that. Like the things that I agree with. I don't need it in your profile.

Nichole: Yeah.

Daniel: Delon de Colonialized dinner.

Nichole: Yeah. Fuck that restaurant. I feel like

Daniel: there was a restaurant, there was a restaurant in Portland, that marketed itself as a colonial restaurant and. It was just from, some lady from the, you know, the former English fucking empire or whatever. And, but people started protesting it. Oh my God. It was like, don't you have something else to fucking protest Portland, Oregon Besides somebody, somebody making curry eggs.

Daniel: Yeah.

Laurel: Anyways,

Laurel: um,

Laurel: but I feel like that's another you can show don't tell thing. there are ways to, insinuate your left of center without being no maga I promise I'm an ally.

Laurel: Like, yes. Because those lists, like, yes, I believe those lists weigh less than someone who's just actually showing up.

Nichole: I think it also is in line with like the no, like the leading with the negative, right? Yes. Yeah. Like if you wanna be approachable, let's say you're walking into a bar, right?

Mm-hmm.

Nichole: Like, are you gonna walk into a bar with a giant sign that's like, these are all the things I hate.

Nichole: Yeah. And like, these are all the things I don't wanna do tonight. No. You're gonna walk in maybe a little bit more open and, in the three like sections of this profile where it is leading with the negative, I think that there is a. Positive mirror.

Laurel: I also like what you're saying about this because I think leading with it in a more positive light also shows that you're more fun.

Nichole: Yeah. That

Laurel: way you don't have

Nichole: to say that you're fun.

Laurel: Yeah.

Daniel: Yeah. I mean, I think that it, if you show that you're fun, it kind of shows that you're more queer because

Laurel: Yeah. 'cause straight people are fucking boring as hell.

Daniel: Exactly.

Laurel: Sorry, one person I'm dating who's straight.

Daniel: I mean, he's gay for sharks.

Laurel: Aw. Aww.

Daniel: Continuing.

Daniel: romance needs to come back in style. Want to join me? Sparkly heart emoji. I'd love to make you melt like an ice cream that's laying on the Coney Island boardwalk in the height of summer.

No, no.

Daniel: I'm sorry. Stu. Stu, we love you. We love you. We love you, we love you. But, but I,

Nichole: I don't wanna be a, a discarded ice cream on the corner. I don't,

Laurel: honestly, I don't wanna think about anything lying on the sidewalk of the Coney Island Birdwalk.

Daniel: I don't know. I mean, if you could tell like, a story about, like finding me behind the fortune tellers booth or something

Laurel: and you're melting on the sidewalk?

Daniel: No, like, just like me, like on the ground, on a tarp with my, on a tarp.

Laurel: I mean, you need to be on the tarp.

Daniel: Yes. I

Laurel: don't, don't,

Daniel: not on the sidewalk.

Laurel: Don't, don't, don't put your hands on the sidewalk. I don't eat ice cream off the sidewalk. Don't,

Daniel: I would question applying any simile to the person you're trying to woo with an inanimate object, right? . I doubly questioned comparing them to food and then Tripoli question whether you should compare them to a melty ice cream cone.

Nichole: Because that's not just food, that is discarded food, dropped food. Like that's like, kicked to the curb trash.

Daniel: It is also. All already overly sexualized food, like whipped cream and fucking strawberries. Like all the things that people do on the bachelorette uhhuh when they're, when they're like having a erotic food experience.

Daniel: Ooh. Like I feel like I hate that. I hate it so much.

Laurel: Everybody hates that. Everybody hates that. That's why they do it. I also, I don't like being hot. Yeah, me neither. So like, when I think about that scenario, I'm like, oh, it's so hot on Coney Island in the summer.

Daniel: Too bad.

Daniel: You're already hot.

Laurel: It is hot out today. It hasn't even hit like 90 degrees. And I am like. Walking around with my top off

Nichole: Laurel walked through our door in just a sports bra with like her romper half undone and just like, just get me

Daniel: naked. Yeah.

Laurel: Like it's hot out there.

Daniel: I do like the Coney Island reference.

Laurel: I

Nichole: do. Yeah. Coney Island is fun and flirty. But again, like, I don't know that we need the declaration. That romance is dead. Let me revive it for you.

Daniel: Yeah. Chivalrous folks. Give me the sks like it's a

Nichole: malady.

Nichole: We don't need to be ma lady.

Daniel: Unless you're gonna ride her like a horse. Mm.

Laurel: Okay. But what's something better?

Laurel: 'cause I do like the idea of like saying like,, oh, I'm a romantic person yes. Yeah. I am a romantic person. I enjoy, I en I enjoy romance and. And Pson romance because I'm fun.

Daniel: Romance and pson. 'cause I'm fun. Romances, sin and pson till you're done.

Daniel: Romances, sin and pson on the run. Romances, sin, and pson. It's so fun. Did I say fun twice?

Laurel: You did. So let's just make a link to that and then you can put that in your profile. Stuper.

Daniel: I do feel like we, we railed this profile pretty hard, so there are lots of things that I like about it.

Nichole: Yeah, of course.

Daniel: We just happen to be, three chuckle fucks on parade today. Especially

Nichole: chuckle fucks on.

Daniel: And If you want a transplant with the amazing poly amateur hour, cyborg arm, we're gonna have to amputate the arm. You have? What

Laurel: are we talking about? What I like seriously spaced out for a minute there.

Daniel: It's okay. I'm just having a good time.

Daniel: Okay, great. Yeah.

Laurel: Like me going in and outta the curtains. Exactly.

Laurel: Okay. Yeah. What do we like? Like this is an open, transparent situation. Mm-hmm. You don't have to hammer it too hard. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm.

Daniel: I do think though, that he could be a little bit more explicit about what the relationship is because he's married.

Nichole: Oh yeah, cause it sounds like that list is in relation to the long-term relationship that he is in. Yeah.

Daniel: And then starting it out with looking for friends with sparks makes me think you're only looking for friends with benefits.

Laurel: Yeah. Yeah. Mm-hmm.

Daniel: And so if that's true, I think that's fine.

Nichole: Yeah.

Daniel: If it's not, maybe be a little bit more explicit about what you are looking for.

Nichole: Yeah. I kind of like the term friends with sparks. Me too. I do like that. I think that's really sweet. 'cause it's I don't know, friends with benefits is

Laurel: Well, yeah. Well you could follow that up like friends with Sparks and then go into the romance bit a little bit.

Laurel: Oh yeah. Friends with, with Sparks. I wanna romance you.

Daniel: I like the lists of things that he likes to do. Like these are romantic things too. Like does he even need to say that he's romantic? Romantic if he lists a few more things under the kind of umbrella of making out under an umbrella in the rain?

Laurel: That is true. That's true. Yeah.

Laurel: Like wanna find friends with sparks so we can make out in a cozy bar under an umbrella in the rain. I like that. Go see some music.

Daniel: I also think that it could be more specific with. The types of music and creative endeavors that he enjoys. Like I happen to know a little bit about this, Stu, just because he has interacted with us for a while.

Daniel: Mm-hmm. And we've exchanged some fun, creative stuff. Yeah. And like he's an incredibly talented and skilled artist. Yeah. Mm-hmm. And his interests in music and in design are far more deep and compelling than the shortness of the shrift here gives them. Right? Mm-hmm. Too bad

Laurel: you're straight Stu. 'cause I think you just made a match.

Wow.

Nichole: That shows, I don't know the, I don't wanna say shows that you're interesting, but like. Yeah. But it does. But it does. Yeah. That's the kinda shit that I like to know about people. If I see somebody, I'm more likely to swipe right.

Nichole: If I see somebody like in an art studio. Yes. Yeah. Like this is my creative endeavor. Yeah, totally. Just, I'm like, great. Cool. You've got something going on other than

Laurel: Yes. And there's something about having like, just enough information, whether that's like Yeah. What kind of design or what kind of music you do.

Laurel: Mm-hmm. that's like an access point for someone to ask questions. Mm-hmm. And start a conversation with you. Yes, exactly.

Daniel: Alright, shall we take a look at the pictures?

Nichole: Show 'em pictures.

Nichole: I was just thinking we don't know what other kinds of pictures this person has at their disposal.

Nichole: Oh. So I guess we can give them, like, we can give them assignments to take

Laurel: pictures. Yeah. If they don't have them at their disposal,

Daniel: we're gonna come out and visit you Stubbert and take some candid photography.

Nichole: What if we did that? We made a trip just to take a couple photos on our iPhones. Yeah.

Daniel: We just storm into his house.

Daniel: Like Queer Eye

Laurel: wait, I wanna start that as a thing. When we go and visit Stuss and we, we should all take a picture together and then they should put it on their dating profile

Nichole: and we should start to pop up in like different things and people are like, who the fuck are these people?

Nichole: And those people.

Daniel: If you would like to Photoshop us into your dating profile, write to us at Poly Amateur hour@gmail.com

Nichole: Or just do it? Yeah, yeah, yeah. And then we'll find you when we're looking in your city for unicorn. Yes. Yes.

Daniel: Okay.

Nichole: Okay.

Daniel: I don't know that we need to go through these pictures one by one. I'm going to, we're gonna, let's share them all and then I'll make a fast forward sound effect, and then we'll discuss. Okay. Okay.

Laurel: , the zebra wall one

Daniel: Yes.

Laurel: Gives me, gives me black lodge vibes.

Daniel: So you love it. So

Laurel: I love it.

Daniel: Sounds like you just made a match.

Laurel: And the payphone one gives me just like, Kyle McLaughlin's, like, I was gonna say that. Instagram vibes. Yeah.

Nichole: Yeah.

Laurel: And

so

Nichole: I love that. Yeah.

Daniel: Those are two of the ones that I liked the best

Nichole: too.

Nichole: Yes. I think. Okay. So of these photos, there are three that are, taken. In clubs or a place that is club adjacent because there is like fun lighting. There's fun lighting. Yeah. Right. It's like either all blue or all purple or all pink. I think you only need one of those. Mm-hmm. And I think it should be the zebra.

Nichole: Yeah. Wall one.

Daniel: I think that the payphone one definitely has to stay. mainly. . I just like to imagine that he's like given me a call in my like nineties nostalgic dream world, you know? Like, hi, nobody calls me here. I'm all alone in the void.

Daniel: And it looks fun. There's one of him leaning against a car, A vintage car

Daniel: I think if you wanna spice it up, like maybe do like a take, take your pants off.

Daniel: Yeah. Like the magazines where it's like Hot Babes on Hot rods?

Laurel: Oh yes. So are you saying you want more women on the car?

Laurel: No. What you saying? I want, I want more

Daniel: skin.

Laurel: Oh, you want him on the car like

Daniel: in short shorts.

Laurel: Alright, so go back to this car.

Nichole: I think I disagree. Um, wow. Okay.

Daniel: kink shame much.

Nichole: Oh my God. I saw it as like. as a conversation opener of like, is that your car? Is that a car that you visited?

Nichole: Is that a car, is that a car and a museum? Like, like what's with the car? Personally, like I grew up around like very old cars and have some connection to it. So it would be, it would be an, a conversation starter for me. Mm-hmm. Yeah.

Daniel: I'm gonna, I'm gonna give this guy the sexist treatment that women usually receive.

Daniel: Mm-hmm. And be like, would it hurt you to smile? See, not smiling in any of them. He has a little cute smirk in like one of them. Yeah. Like, he's got like this almost like, it's like maybe I'm just on the verge of smiling, but. There's enough that are kind of like really serious. Yeah. Where going through the whole catalog makes me miss a little bit of,

Laurel: yeah.

Daniel: Levity. Let me see you. Yeah. Lemme see you loosen up.

Laurel: Yeah. If you're fun, give us a smile. Yeah, you're right. You're right.

Daniel: Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

Nichole: What

Daniel: I just love hearing you two tell a boy to smile.

Laurel: Yeah. Smile. Buck up. Champ

Daniel: things to look it up for you. Now that you got a little help from the poly amateur.

Laurel: So be a little bit more, a little bit more positive. Mm-hmm. A little bit more show, don't tell. Yes. We like the, kissing under umbrella. cozy in a bar. I do. I like things where I can picture being on a date with the person.

Nichole: Yeah. Yes. Yeah. What we're gonna do together. Yeah. Yes. Yeah. Agreed.

Laurel: And take some of the pressure off of like, what the fuck am I gonna do with this person? Yeah. we like sort of the more like pictures where you can, create the space a little bit. Mm-hmm. So I can ask you about the club you're in or ask you about the car you're on.

Laurel: Yeah.

Daniel: There's a story. Yeah. There's

Laurel: a yes. Thank you.

Nichole: There's a little

Laurel: bit.

Nichole: It's an invitation to. Love, ask a question. Yeah.

Daniel: Should we just, should we just, have it almost be like PeeWee's magic word and every time somebody says, Invitation to whatever. , we all scream

Laurel: love.

Laurel: And then the couch starts talking.

Laurel: um, I'm just gonna bring this up really casually in the middle of a segment. Hmm. How do you guys feel about, buying a house together? I mean, we've thought about it, Nicole.

Laurel: I know

Daniel: where this is going.

Laurel: Well, I just feel like I would watch more documentaries.

Daniel: Have you seen a house that you like?

Laurel: I

Nichole: see houses all the time, but, oh, I really thought you were g asking. How do you feel about buying a house together and making it into PeeWee's Playhouse? Oh no, I just meant

Laurel: like, how do you feel about buying a house with me?

Laurel: Oh,

Daniel: Nicole is, Nicole is only fucking down for this. If we're turning into PeeWee's Playhouse.

Nichole: I could make a talking chair. I really genuinely thought that's where you were going. I didn't know you were saying something like, this is genuinely sweet.

Nichole: This isn't a bit

Daniel: Laurel. You're one of the only people that I can really imagine actually puppeteering a talking chair, like being in the chair. Yeah. And I get to sit on it.

Nichole: Thank you, babe. Yeah. It seems so a brand for you. And I'm disappointed in myself that I thought it was a bit really sad.

Daniel: I mean, we talk about it all the time. We share the poly castles we have, we have some serious pet incompatibility, which has been tough.

Laurel: That is true. And I would say, I mean we can talk about it later.

Daniel: I'm a no cat zone.

Laurel: Yeah. Let's really hash this out right now, because I'm thinking a long enough timeline like my animals are aging.

Daniel: Yeah,

Laurel: they're both teenagers.

Daniel: Yeah. Mm-hmm. Pretty soon they're gonna learn to drive. Yeah.

Laurel: Pretty soon they're gonna move out.

Nichole: I think we should get like a cottage cluster. I think we should lose. Yeah. I've also thought about that. Yeah, close. Like closer. I mean, you're already home, like I could already ride my bike over, but

Daniel: should, should we buy the shitty cottage cluster that our our neighbor built?

Daniel: Okay. A cottage cluster in Portland, Oregon is a very quaint term for this really obnoxious thing where people build like multi-story condos, multiple multi-story condos on a single property. Not even

Nichole: con These are houses, these are straight up houses. Yeah. He

Daniel: basically built two, two story houses in the backyard Yeah.

Daniel: Of a third house.

Laurel: There's, yeah. They're splitting. There's, you're, they're splitting lots into three plus. Homes

Nichole: I'm gonna go pee before we go into our next episode.

Daniel: Nicole. Nicole's bladder is irritated by talk of cohabitating.

Laurel: It's fair, it's a no, it's adjacent Habiting.

Daniel: if you say adjacent habiting enough, does that mean that you can ward off the idea of having a house together? She's on the run. She's walking away while we talk about it.

Daniel: I think this is one of the episodes where we keep Nicole's absence in the episode where we hear her walking away, hear her coming back.

Laurel: Yeah.

Daniel: And Hear

Laurel: me drinking

Daniel: boba tea,

Laurel: which is really empty. So I'm just sucking boba pearls up through a straw.

Daniel: And that makes it sound like you're giving head to boba fat.

Laurel: Sucking Boba pearls. I mean, I'm okay.

Daniel: I'm just licking his balls.

Laurel: Do they show, do you ever see Boba fat's face?

Daniel: I thought you were gonna ask if we ever see Boba Fat's Dick,

Laurel: do we ever, that should have been my first question.

Daniel: It's got a helmet.

Laurel: Oh, it must be safe

Daniel: but clunky. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Laurel: Are mandalorians allowed to have sex?

Daniel: I don't know. Do they have to keep the armor on

Laurel: all the

Daniel: time?

Daniel: Yeah. It's kind of hot, but it's like a little boba. Like, like Peter.

Laurel: It's just a tiny version.

Daniel: Yeah. With him, with his, with all

Laurel: of the armor on,

Daniel: with his helmet on the,

Laurel: I'm not sure if I like this or not.

Daniel: It doesn't matter if you like it. This is the way that he is.

Laurel: This is the way.

Laurel: Oh my God.

Daniel: Yes.

Laurel: We just did Star Wars reference.

Daniel: Oh shit. We're canceled by ourselves.

Laurel: Oh my God. We did a long form Star Wars reference.

Nichole: I had the thought as I was leaving the bathroom. I wonder how much shit they talk about me when I'm not here. And then I heard you guys laughing and then I was like, I wonder what joke I missed. And then I was like, I'll just listen to it on the qa.

Laurel: Yeah. Secrets are always revealed.

Is it time? It's timer

Daniel: two.

Ask the amateurs.

Nichole: Are you ready? Ready.

Daniel: Okay. Ready.

Nichole: Hiya. Friends at the top. I really appreciate a hiya. I say hiya all the time. I fucking love it.

Nichole: Okay. Hiya friends. I'm a stu from Australia. And your personal podcast promo girl for the poly hues down under hell. Yeah. And I have a question for the amateurs. Sorry. I, I went really hard on, down under, 'cause I'm trying really hard not to say down under.

Nichole: Okay.

Daniel: She knew what she was getting into. She's heard. Waiting for Good day.

Nichole: Okay. I am new to polyamory and learning a lot through listening to you all and reading as much poly Reddit. Thanks, Nicole. As I can. what I can't really find any deeper insight into online is what happens when I spend more time connecting and communicating with my metamor than my partner.

Nichole: Is there a correct balance to strive for here? So the dynamic doesn't get weird. I'm finding that I'm confused about the rules, quote unquote here. Side note, I'm autistic, so understanding social rules is a bit of a fixation slash challenge for me.

Mm-hmm.

Nichole: What is your experience with this for context? I started dating my Polly boyfriend two years ago when he had one long-term primary nesting partner who I never met. For me, it was just a bit of fun and I didn't let my heart get involved until it did. Then we got more serious, they broke up and we continued to fall in love will both casually dating new people.

Daniel: I love it when we hear from people from the former British empire ' cause we get a wils.

Nichole: Oh, we get a Wilt and we got a Metamour spelled with a U. Wow. Yeah, it's beautiful.

Daniel: It's a much more complex metamor. I find all of my metamours to be rather simpletons

Laurel: spool out.

Daniel: You just pissed off a lot of people.

Daniel: Yeah,

Laurel: you did.

Daniel: It was really rude. They just need to spell themselves better. Spell yourselves.

Nichole: All right. A few months ago he fell in love with a poly woman and I agreed to meet her. She aspired for a non-hierarchical KTP relationship. KTP meaning kitchen table poly.

Daniel: Is that Nicole explaining?

Nichole: Yeah. That's me.

Nichole: Mm-hmm. Yeah, because I just went off about acronyms. within a month we all shifted into this new KTP dynamic together. It's a first for all of us. She's amazing. We get on ridiculously well. We both work in the arts, so have a shared community. And to be honest, I speak to her more than him now. She initiates a lot of contact, shares, a lot of her day with me.

Nichole: we have cute outings together, talk a lot about our young kids and our pets, and perhaps I am a smidge disappointed that I don't have that kind of close connection with my boyfriend, which clearly needs to and will be addressed directly with him. Either way. I love my connection with my metamor and don't really want that to change, but is it too much?

Nichole: Should I be concerned about how that might affect my relationship with my boyfriend down the track, given now I am often finding out about his day to day via her. Your thoughts and advice please. And thank you xx. Thanks Stewart.

Laurel: This is a great one. It's a great one.

Laurel: Have either of you been in this situation before?

Daniel: I mean sometimes I'm like editing this podcast and I'm just hearing you guys just like bat shit back and forth. Bat shit. Bat. I hear you. Bat bat shit back and forth. Bat shittily,

Laurel: uhhuh,

Daniel: uhhuh. Yeah. And I'm, are you feeling okay?

Daniel: I'm off my meds and. You know, sometimes I'm like, you have a certain kind of connection that I cannot have with either of you.

Laurel: Yeah. Sorry about that.

Daniel: It's okay. I am totally okay with it. In fact, it is really like, so I guess I'm in the situation more of the stupid once removed the partner of our stubbert.

Daniel: Where it's not like you guys spend more time together than you do with me, but you definitely have a connection. You go and do things without me. Yeah. Mm-hmm. Um, So I'm curious, like I, I always like it, far be it from me to discourage our stews, from asking us the questions that they should be asking of their partners.

Daniel: I like being the middle person. Right. I would prefer it if they gave us the contact information of their partners so that we can, you know,

Nichole: oh no,

Daniel: just go direct.

Oh, no.

Daniel: But I think that fundamentally, like this is a question that you need to ask of your partner Right. Is how he feels about it. Right.

Nichole: If there's a question that needs to be asked

Yeah.

Nichole: Because I think there's a couple things in here. one amazing that you have that relationship with your Metamor. Mm-hmm. I really appreciated this question because I, I've said it before on this podcast with Laurel, it's just a different kind of closeness. Yeah. It's a different kind of love.

Nichole: And, I am grateful for it all the time, not just because I have somebody who can validate I being annoyed with you. Um, I'm kidding. Um, I'm not Aria,

Daniel: aria, I've, I've actually seen the shared Google Doc of bullet points about shit Daniel does.

Nichole: but there is like, there, there is something very special about loving somebody who I know makes my partner so happy.

Mm-hmm.

Nichole: And like welcoming her into our lives so that it creates this like, third space, right? Mm-hmm.

Daniel: But not, but not getting a house together. Apparently

Nichole: that third space is the third house on the property.

Daniel: Oh. This is how Nicole tells me that she wants to move out and have her own house.

Laurel: I'm just saying, I mean, that is like kind of ideal. Very ideal. Yeah. Not possible,

Nichole: but ideal. Um, So there, there's that. And you, and I hear the gratitude come through the letter and I say Revel in it.

Laurel: Mm-hmm.

Nichole: I think that the other piece of this, that, the one sentence that you said, I hear about his day to day via her.

Nichole: Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. That might be what's sparking this whole thing of like, am I spending too much time? Yeah. Mm. Because I don't think the question is, am I spending too much time? I think it is, am I neglecting my relationship with my boyfriend? Yeah.

Mm.

Nichole: Yeah.

Laurel: That's an interesting piece. So Sean in particular, a lot of his partners I end up becoming friends with. Sean and I have always lived some distance apart, whether it was a few hours or like continence apart.

Laurel: But I have had that situation where I start to know more about Sean via these other people than our direct communication with each other. And it is in part, and Stewart mentions this of , this Metamor initiates a lot of conversation. Ah-huh. I'm not the biggest texter mm-hmm.

Laurel: Or the biggest phone caller, but I will engage. If someone else is initiating a lot, I'll talk to them a lot. Mm-hmm. But me not being a huge initiator and Sean also not being a huge initiator, like we just don't have that kind of connection. Mm-hmm. I,

Laurel: And I have felt weird about that. Mm-hmm. Of like either getting information that I'm like, like, oh, I think I would've preferred to hear this from my partner, even if it's not like a big deal kind of stuff.

Laurel: Like, oh he went on a date with this new person. Mm-hmm. And I'm like, oh, I, I should have known that. Mm-hmm. It's some like amorphous sort of expectation that I'm putting on the idea of a relationship that like, oh, I'm supposed to hear about that from my partner,

Daniel: I think Sean is a very special case. He is, oh, I'm gonna use a big word. He's the most peregrine of your partners. Um, He's a Peregrine. What did you say? He moves around a lot.

Laurel: Yeah, he does move around a lot.

Daniel: It's almost like his other partners for you. They're like air tags pinging his presence to you so you know where's not true.

Daniel: Yeah. You know where he's at in the world. He's like, oh, he is fucking in Uruguay.

Laurel: I do, yeah. I do kind of find that out through like my Metamours Instagrams often. That's funny. I'm like, oh, they're together.

Nichole: Yeah. the realization that you had that like, oh, my metamours they engage more. Yeah. And so they find out more. Did you have a conversation, did you do something about it or are you accepting , they just might get more information than I do.

Laurel: What I figured out was, yeah, if I was, feeling bad about that in a way where genuinely, I needed to know more. Mm-hmm. I needed to initiate more.

Mm-hmm.

Laurel: Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Then realizing like through attempts to initiate more and not always being super successful at that, realizing that it wasn't actually that important to me.

Yeah,

Laurel: yeah. That like he is going to tell me about the important stuff in his life when he wants to, or when we do connect.

Daniel: I guess that date with that one lady wasn't that important.

Laurel: I mean, so, so, you know, sometimes it's not. Yeah, yeah, yeah. and so, coming to terms like, okay, where am I actually at in the relationship? And Sean and I talk about this. Often about how much we appreciate the dynamic that we have with each other. Mm-hmm. Um,

Laurel: I haven't had the insecurity of like, oh, if Sean and I don't talk this week, like, we're losing touch with each other. Mm-hmm. Like, I never feel like that. Yeah. and like we know, like when we need each other, like we can go to each other and I can have little meltdown in an Airbnb and call him even though he is like 12 hours away and like,

Nichole: yeah.

Laurel: Like that is there.

Laurel: Sometimes like each of us, I think gets these pangs of like, oh, you're doing fun stuff with this other person and they're so entwined in your life. Mm-hmm. Yeah. Yeah. And I'm not, and even though we've been dating for eight years or whatever, and it's like,

Nichole: I mean,

Nichole: I really like that you guys do a ton of shit without me. I, I Came home from being away for almost a week and I had a, we had a new spatula, just like in our kitchen and I was like, what is this? And Daniel was like, I want it. And I was like, where at this thing that Laurel and I went to, what thing?

Daniel: I don't think it was this difficult to get it outta me.

Nichole: No.

Daniel: Where did you get this? And I said, I want it at a puppet slam.

Nichole: That's right. I want it at a puppet slam. And I was like, well, that sounds like a lot of fun.

Daniel: I'm realizing that you might've thought that I was puppeteering because how else did I win it at a fucking puppet slam. That's what,

Nichole: that's what I thought. I was like, you guys went to a place and you made puppets and then you won the puppet slam with your puppet doing poetry about a spatula.

Daniel: We are the puppets.

Daniel: You know, you know that we go to this event and somebody sticks their hand up our ass.

Nichole: My god. Oh, it was right there. Um, You guys do shit without me all the time. And I get, I get spatulas out of it. I get new utensils.

Daniel: Yeah. Whenever me and Laurel travel or do something, you know, we went to Disneyland, brought home a

Laurel: a garlic press.

Daniel: I was thinking it was just a different spatula. Like shaped like the ears. Mouse ears. Yeah.

Nichole: They have those.

Daniel: so I don't think that you should compare No, no. Your relationship with your partner to your relationship with your metamor. It's apples to oranges if you are fucking the apple, you know, don't, don't, don't fuck the apple.

Daniel: Don't fuck the apple. I mean, there is one thing that I want to know. Mm. Like. Is there some friends with Sparks Energy?

Laurel: Oh, I was curious about that too.

Daniel: Like is there some romantic energy between you and the Metamore? Like who's buying the situation? I hope everybody,

somebody buy,

Daniel: like

Laurel: our advice is hook up with your Metamore.

Laurel: I was gonna say, there doesn't have to be.

Nichole: No, doesn't have to be.

Daniel: It doesn't have to be. But

Nichole: Laurel and I, I mean, good bless Laurel. I love you, but I'm sorry I've already made clear on this podcast. I'm not joining your sex party. It's like, I'd rather take a bath and go to bed.

Daniel: When we write a book altogether, there will be a quote.

Daniel: From Nicole in the back, even though she's one of the authors,

Laurel: we have her, we have quotes from ourselves. Yeah. About our own book. Yeah. And her, I like this idea

Daniel: and hers will be, I'm not joining any of your sex parties. Get off my lawn.

Laurel: I'd much rather take a bath.

Nichole: I feel like that book is gonna be a choose your own adventure written by you two.

Nichole: And then I'm interrupting every like three or four pages going like, what they mean by this is,

Nichole: did we answer the question?

Laurel: I think it should be choose your own adventure, but you have three choices and it's the Daniel Choice. The Laurel Choice with the Nicole Choice.

Nichole: And the Nicole Choice is the right choice.

Nichole: Yeah. Fair. I'm kidding. You guys have really good advice.

Daniel: Okay. One of the reasons that I don't think that you should be comparing these relationships, and I'm gonna get a little gendered here because it sounds like all these people are gendered, right? Mm-hmm. I'm going to assume I'm going to sisu that everybody's like a assigned whatever at birth that they stuck with the assignment.

Daniel: Okay? Yeah. Okay. And that the dude is a dude. Mm-hmm. Right? I think the grandeur and beauty of friendships between women can sometimes far exceed in their level of like emotional sharing and disclosure and like, yes. Like intimacy in that way often.

Daniel: Exceed romantic partnerships with cis dudes. Mm-hmm. Cis dudes have been trained in the high stakes, paramilitary conditions of junior high

Daniel: to protect their emotions at all costs. I'm not saying that you won't be able to get this guy to like open up to you, but I wouldn't look for the same level of intimacy. I wouldn't hold him to that standard. because He might never get there. He might, but he might not. And the thing about polyamory. In its broadest definition, it's not just, you know, not just about having multiple sexual partners and multiple romantic partners, but like really multiple committed relationships of all kinds.

Daniel: Like Laurel, you often talk about how you have certain friendships mm-hmm. In your life that for all intents and purposes, are partnerships. Right.

Laurel: Oh my God, Jess is moving out here at like the end of the month, like beginning of next month. I'm so excited. Oh my God. My friend who lives in Texas and I haven't seen her in like years i'm gonna cry. Anyway, sorry.

Daniel: Our Texas numbers are gonna crash. Yeah.

Daniel: So that's all I'm saying is like, is like, don't, yes. Yeah. Don't, don't try to make the boy fit the mold of the amazing meta women's friendship.

Laurel: Yeah. Yeah. You're right. That's, yeah, that's a good point. Like don't just not compare your relationship with your partner to your metamours relationship with your partner, but don't compare your relationship with your metamor to your relationship with a partner.

Laurel: Yes, exactly. Yeah. Like Daniel is saying, like the beauty of polyamory is allowing relationships to develop organically. Mm-hmm. And obviously you've had a really beautiful organic relationship with your Metamore Evolve

Daniel: Could be orgasmic. It could.

Laurel: Okay. Stop trying One more thing. Sorry.

Daniel: I can ship what stewards I want.

Laurel: Okay. That's fair. It's fair. All right. Colombo, what,

Laurel: and one more thing. Um,

Laurel: One thing that we don't talk about a lot but does happen is like game changing relationships where you have a relationship that just makes you realize a new standard mm-hmm.

Laurel: Of how you want to comport your relationships. Yeah. Mm-hmm. And sometimes that can happen with a metamour too, I would like to relate like this to more people. Yeah. Partners. Yeah. Yeah.

Daniel: Non

Laurel: partners. Yeah. Animals, birds.

Laurel: Tweet, tweet,

yeah. That's all. Beautiful.

Nichole: Shall we move along home?

Daniel: Why I think we shall,

what's next?

Daniel: Oh,

we no whistle. Lecture the lyrics. Fuck.

Nichole: What language was that?

Daniel: I was trying to sing a song, which I had no, I had no idea what the lyrics were. But you know the song where he goes, click,

Daniel: there you go. And the guy goes,

Nichole: the,

that's what your jacket looks like. It's too big. You, you put me in this jacket. You put me in this jacket and you're gonna get out it.

Laurel: God. Oh my God. Okay. What's next? Monogamy. Are you In this week's episode of Monogamy, are you okay? I found this little Diddy on, Reddit, the, am I overreacting, Reddit which is just a wealth of monogamy.

Laurel: Are you Okay? So I'll read this post. there's a picture, it's of a woman's wrist, and there's a tattoo on it, and the tattoo has a person's name and a date, okay. I'll read the post. In 2023, I. 23 female lost my late boyfriend unexpectedly. It was devastating. He was a huge part of my life as we were childhood best friends, and then dated for three years.

Laurel: After he passed, I got a meaningful tattoo in his memory. Now I'm dating someone new. Recently things have been going well overall, and he knew about my late boyfriend. But recently he actually saw the tattoo and took notice to it in proper detail. He got visibly upset. He said it made him feel disrespected and like I'm not over my ex.

Laurel: He basically implied I should remove or cover it up. I tried to explain that grief and love aren't black and white, and that honoring the past doesn't mean I can't be present in a new relationship. But he just kept saying it's weird and made him feel second best. Oh, am I overreacting for being hurt by his reaction, Or is it fair that he feels threatened by a piece of my past? And then the last sentence is just explaining that she included a picture for reference.

Daniel: And a picture is just a kind of imm, right? It's just a person's name. Which, which happens to be my name. And I was, I was curious about your motivation in bringing this up, and a date range as far as like when he was born and when he expired.

Nichole: Oh, my, I, okay. Oh my God. So this makes me sad for a couple of reasons.

Nichole: One, that someone could be threatened by a dead person. Two, that this woman took to the internet to validate whether or not he was justified in his being threatened by a dead person. Yeah,

Daniel: that she felt that she had to go to the internet.

Daniel: Yes. Yeah. Like that She didn't, just didn't know that that was the shittiest possible take of all time.

Nichole: Oh my God, yes. Yes.

Daniel: Oh my God. Do you guys notice how much we talk about ghosts for, for a podcast about polyamory? But it's topical here. Like the guy is upset, he thinks that his girlfriend is cheating on him with a ghost.

Nichole: How is he second best? How can he feel second best if she dated this person before they met? Yeah. And this guy is no longer, he's un alive.

Laurel: Yeah.

Nichole: Like he's no longer, I mean, according to Daniel, he is roaming the earth.

Daniel: you know, this is how I think E 40 refers to dead people in one of his songs. there's a whole song

Nichole: you just wanted to bring up.

Nichole: E 40,

Daniel: E 40. If you're listening,

Nichole: please reach out to us. Um, did you screen cap any of the comments?

Laurel: Yeah, so like the, the best comments are like, are you fucking kidding me? Yeah. there's a lot of, I feel like Reddit is so full of the shit that like,

Laurel: it's okay for everybody to have whatever feelings they have. which Sure. But like, don't express them.

Daniel: Yeah,

Laurel: yeah.

Nichole: Yeah. Don't make them somebody else's problem

Laurel: There's a few people that are like, I would never date you. You know

Daniel: the

Laurel: fuck. Like,

Daniel: because you've been branded by a ghost.

Laurel: Yeah, yeah. Oh my God. And like, how fucking insecure do you have to be? The most, the most, the most insecure,

Daniel: , The ghost insecure.

Laurel: The, is that a reference to something that I don't know.

Daniel: No, I'm just rhyming things.

Laurel: Yeah. The most, the ghost. The ghost with the most, oh, is there a wrap coming on?

Daniel: I propose a toast.

Nichole: I am praying that she ended it with this guy because if he is reacting this way to a person who has passed away. Oh yeah. Just imagine how he would react to like, lingering too long at like the checkout line talking to the like cashier, You guys.

Daniel: You guys

Nichole: what, what, what, what,

Daniel: what if he's a necrophiliac and he's projecting. Therefore he is only jealous of dead people.

Daniel: It's fine. Like you can see whoever you want. I don't even need to be exclusive, but, but not if they're dead. You come home smelling of grave, dirt, God.

Laurel: Yucky, gross, yucky, yucky, yucky.

Daniel: Maybe I should go back on my meds.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

Nichole: I know that I said this before, but this kind of thing also happened on sex in the city.

Nichole: Kind of, it is kind of related. There is a, there is a man that Charlotte is dating Uhhuh that she meets in the cemetery, I think. And he's like grieving his late wife, you know, and she comes to respect and revere her memory and understand that like he lost this person and she no longer feels, she works through the jealousy.

Nichole: Mm-hmm. And then come to find out, he uses that line on a lot of women and they all show up at the same time. Like at this like Memoria? Yeah. Like for whatever reason, they all show up at the cemetery at the same time.

Daniel: Is it actually his wife?

Nichole: No, no, no. Just, just it. He's just using, he

just picks up women at the cemetery.

Laurel: Yeah, yeah, yeah. All right, so this is a cautionary tale. Oh, man. Do you think this Reddit user just got an immor tattoo for somebody who doesn't exist

Daniel: to make somebody to make, to, just to make a necrophiliac jealous.

Daniel: Just to make a necrophiliac jealous. The, the lengths that we

go to,

Daniel: Are we ready to bury the subject?